Never Enough
by leoslady4ever
Summary: GaLu Week: Day 6 - GUILT **** It haunts him...every hit, every kick, every horrifying second of his attack. And he knows...repentance will never be enough.


_Oops! Almost didn't post this on time! So crazy considering it was one of the first ones I wrote. lol And just to let you know, I believe **Nicole4211** has a follow up written for this :D Go bug her about it. lol_

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**_GaLu Week: Day 6 - GUILT_**

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_**Hiro Mashima** owns Fairy Tail._

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**NEVER ENOUGH**

He watches her from across the room, watches the way she laughs and carries on. Her heart is free, and her smile is easy. He sees the way her eyes dance when she's amused, the way her brow furrows when she's concerned.

She's happy with her life, and it shows. She's surrounded by people that adore her, people that respect her and would do anything to protect her. How many beings in this world command that sort of following?

She smells like the air after a summer's rain, all fresh and clean. It's a scent that drives him crazy, an aroma that damn near brings him to his knees, but he manages to keep his cool. So far, no one has learned of his interest. That would be a horrible breach of his sanity.

After all, they could never work. They are far too different, and too much has happened between them. Too much water under the proverbial dysfunctional bridge, he supposes. They are on opposite ends of humanity, he's sure. She so clearly has always been on the side of right, and he, just as obviously, has not.

No, they are completely and totally unsuited for one another...in every way other than his heart. He's watched her for months, very nearly a year now, and he's finally realized what he feels for her. He loves her, every single solitary inch of her, every odd little thing she does, every shrug, every tip of her head. He loves her.

But he will never do anything to show it. He will never let his eyes tell the truth of his feelings, because deep inside him, in his very soul of souls, he knows...his darkness would dim her light. His past would devastate her future, and he could never live with that.

She is his hope, his secret, unattainable dream. She is that star in the night sky that makes him believe there is good in the world, the one that gives him strength and peace. She is the reason he keeps going when he feels like giving up.

She is quite simply the most breathtaking woman he's ever met...and so achingly far out of his league. She is all that is right in the world, everything that is pure and wonderful. A man like him could never belong with someone like her. And knowing that kills something inside him.

He's never found something he wanted more, never desired anyone the way he does her. But it doesn't matter. He can never give himself over to the idea of having her. To pretend it will happen one day would only demolish what's left of his heart.

Maybe once...a long time ago, he might have deserved her. Maybe before that day when he'd hurt her, he could have argued in his favor, but that was a day he could never take back. It was easily his biggest regret, the one mark that would forever taint his soul.

It is a memory he can never forget, one he doesn't deserve to forget. He should have to live with the bitter tang of guilt for the rest of his life, and he does. Every day, he grieves his choice. Every day, he aches to go back and change what he's done, but he can't.

He can still remember the way she fought him, the way she refused to back down. He can still hear the sound of her scorn, the smack of his fist on her flesh. It haunts him...every hit, every kick, every horrifying second of his attack.

And he knows...repentance will never be enough. His anguish over his treatment of her can never take the blight of sin away. There is no forgiveness for him, no redemption. He is alone with his pain, and it is just as he deserves.

So, he will sit here in this seat, day in and day out, and he will love her from afar. He will mark the days and weeks and months and years. He will watch her fall in love and marry and have children...and his heart will break, over and over again.

He will bear this punishment on his own and pray for her life to be all that she hopes for. He will see her grow old, and wish every moment that he could stand by her side. He knows what awaits him, knows the agony he will endure as he slowly dies inside.

But he will stay...and he will love her all the same. For as he walks through the darkness, she will always be his light.

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**_A/N: If you'd like to participate in GaLu Week, we still have 1 more day! But you can still write or draw for this week - we don't care if you're late :D Here they are:_**

**_1. DATE_**

**_2. TRUST_**

**_3. TOUCH_**

**_4. LONELY_**

**_5. COMMUNICATION_**

**_6. GUILT_**

**_7. SECRETS_**

**_Hope you'll join us in celebrating this great couple! Loves!_**


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